Wardi does the Oscars.

If you weren't able to watch the Oscars this year, or couldn't be bothered (can't blame you for that!), here's a service for you! I sat up all night, just so you didn't have to. (And I even had time for some extensive name dropping...)

Hilary Swank's dress is just awful, and very naughty! Nipple alert! And I had no idea she's Rob Lowe's sister-in-law!
Oh sheesh, Melanie, what's with the stick??
Love Kate Winslet's dress. Heck, just plain love Kate Winslet!
Johnny! Mmmmmm, Johnny in a blue suit!
Cate Blanchett, stunning!
Love Morgan Freeman's black shirt.
Renee Zellweger..honey, I don't care what a big feat it is to lose that much that often, but you look like a stick. Just face it, you're not Nicole Kidman. And dark is definitely not your colour!

Chris Rock.. looks PROMISING!

Morgan Freeman, finally he got an Oscar!

Robin Williams, LOVE THE PINK SHIRT! And that man IS FUNNY! Boy, does he have a firm grip on the award lady!

Woo, The Incredibles best animated! Aight!

How odd to have some of the awards presented in the aisle! I'm not sure I like this... People shoule be up on stage so people could gawk at them! That's what they're there for! And the free drinks!

Couldn't they have found somebody else, who actually speaks French, instead of Bouncy Beyoncée, to sing the song from The Chorus??

Ha! Chris Rock talking to 'the people' about their favourite films of last year... They have very...exquisite tastes... Except none of them in the Oscars... Hmmm....

Scarlett Johansen, so lovely! And she's half Danish! Science and Technical awards.. why do they get snubbed? Aren't they good enough to be at the actual Oscar evening?? Ok, the winners are, but you know.

Ha! Edna from The Incredibles helping Pierce Brosnan with the Costume design award!

Tim Robbins! I love Tim! Ooo, Cate Blanchett for supporting actress. Seems like the Aviator is indeed on the way towards... the big ones?

Leonardo is finally starting to look like a grown-up. I think scruffy-looking would suit him! Oh that's interesting, Supersize Me didn't win best documentary...

Mmmmm.. Orlando... Another award for the Aviator. And Scorsese seemed really touched by that. Although it's difficult to say with those shades!

Mike Meyers! Counting Crows! I love the music they chose for the Shrek films. Oh my GAWD! The singer of Counting Crows! What's with the hair?? And I think the bass player (or whatever) was wearing a shirt that said "I heart Scarlett", but it was a bit hard to see. Any thoughts on that??

Adam Sandler and Catherine Zeta Jones Chris Rock! "Sign me up, mrs. Douglas!" Alexander Payne (when accepting the Oscar for adapted screenplay). Don't poke that thing at me! Can someone find a picture of him holding his Oscar in front of him?

Morgan Freeman, with his Oscar, winking at the camera. Good man.

Al Pacino talking about Sidney Lumet, one of whose films (Dog Day Afternoon) were on telly here earlier. But I don't like films about bank robbing, so I didn't watch it... I find these honourary Oscar presentations pretty boring, I'm sorry to say. Especially if it's for someone who I don't know who is...

Beyoncée, again! Couldn't they find someone else?? I mean, she's talented and all that, but so are plenty of other people! The black dress is great, though. She looks almost like a black Audrey Hepburn.

Another aisle award. That's so odd. Jeremy Irons is funny though. So very British. That woman who got the Oscar for Short film live just said "it's the dog's bollocks"..!

I'd love to see someone drop their Oscar in one of those aisle presentations and then it would roll all the way down to the stage and the person would run chasing after it!

Another Oscar for the Aviator (the 5th), presented by Kate Winslet. And a very nice thank you speech that mentioned nothing of the film industry. Instead he mentioned the people taking care of his mother in the hospital.

Finally, an award to the Incredibles! Sound editing.

Salma Hayek is so pretty. Antonio Banderas singing! The song from the Motorcycle Diaries. And with Carlos Santana. How about that?? Banderas is a passable singer, I guess. But nothing more...

Hahaha. Chris Rock commenting on the aisle awards! Parking lot! McFlurry!

Roger Mayer, Hersholt Humanitarian Award. Hersholt was Danish, cool! We have impact too, baby!

More Beyoncée... Boring.

A little while ago, on the Danish station where I'm watching the show, there was something about the Razzies - the Golden Raspberry Award. They celebrate the worst films etc! The founder of that award described it as a "banana peel on the floor".

Prince! In pink trousers! And a blue jacket! Oooo, the song from motorcycle Diaries won! How great! And the acceptance speech was singing. Excellent.

Aww, I wanted Kate Winslet to get best actress... But nice to see it's Hilary Swank, "I'm just a trailer park girl!" (although it was the obvious choice) get it. And the Clint, I do believe, is shedding a tear or two as well.

Something I think is nice, at the Oscars, compared to other awards shows, is the lack of thanking GOD(!) profusely. It gets embarrassing! But that mostly happens at music awards shows. I wonder why that is..?

Oh Gwyneth's dress is doing nothing good to her "girls".

Oh original Screenplay should go to Eternal Sunshine! YES!! That's bloody awesome! Good job, Charlie! Oh he looks absolutely dwarfed compared to the Oscar models. That of course doesn't happen to Samuel L. Jackson, he's one tall motherfucker!

Jamie Foxx, "daddy, if you don't win, you're still good". Awww.

Eastwood, for director. That was obvious, huh? When will Scorsese get it?? And Clint got best film too. Eh. It's so boring when it's the obvious one that wins...

So, that's it. The Oscar's were as exciting and as boring as usual. Perhaps somewhat more boring since, although initially funny, Chris Rock wasn't the kind of host that we've become used to, i.e. the one and only Billy Crystal. Hopefully Billy will be back next year. Or Robin Williams!

This year's winners.

Thanks for the company, Chris, you're a lovely Oscar date. ;-)

Monday, February 28, 2005 posted by Wardi @ 5:26 AM